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Saturday, December 29, 2007

I am in love!


About 13 years ago Joel and I were in San Antonio running a coffee house called Java Joe's. Since then our passion for coffee has never waned. We ordered from our roaster in SA where ever we lived and had him mail it to us. Our roaster is now the roaster of all the HEB Central market coffees. Anyway we have not had an espresso machine for years. I have had to endure life with Staryucks when I was in the mood and had the cash. Such a burden. Well, Joel is not much of a gift giver, especially at christmas. My stocking was actually empty even though I gave myself a couple of gold chocolate coins, I guess it was raided. It started Thursday. He bought me Ralph Lauren Romance. Then it happened. While I was at work, he did it. He drove to Arlington to Specialty Restaurant Equipment and bought a commercial grade espresso machine for "the business". Now I know you might think this was not for me. You are wrong. God loves me so much that he gave me a good looking, I mean seriously good looking husband that can cook and clean and bring me good coffee, not to mention perfume. So, to be fair, if you ever need to rent a espresso machine for a party, give us a call. I am thinking I might quit my job and just run a mobile coffee cart. What the heck.

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!!!

Saturday, December 01, 2007

Living in Community

We live in community, even when we go off by ourselves. Remember the old song: "I see the moon and the moon sees me, the moon sees somebody I want to see; God bless the moon and God bless me and God bless somebody I want to see." To be in relationship with God is to be in relationship with every person who is also in relationship with God. And we do not need to speak the same language or have the same accent to be in true community; we have only to realize that we are all part of God, and to keep that uppermost in our mind and spirit as we live and relate to each other.
--William A. Kolb, "Community: Where the Holy Spirit Hangs Out"

I love the truth in these statements. I hope we can truly live this out, that polarities do not bring division, but dialogue that reaches deeply into the pockets of our hearts and minds. Stretch and be stretched.

Zeitgeist - The Movie - 2 of 13 (Part 1 of 3 on Religion)

SO as some of you might know, I recently had a spiritual challenge of sorts. I had to reclaim my beliefs and make them sharper in my spirit. Some of that for me is to question, to dialogue, to ponder the deep things. This is one of the ways the world will attack our faith, are we ready to reply, with video? With rhetoric, with application of the word in community love? Are we ready to say that the propaganda that is sold in this format is still bogus regardless of how it is fed to the weaker minded, weaker believers or unbelievers.

Monday, November 26, 2007

I passed!

Thank you for your words of encouragement all. I was so happy on the way to take the test it was weird. On the first ten, I was sick, after that I got my stride and only had a few sinking moments. I looked and looked for the big YOU PASSED in blinking letters.( This means I can legally write presciptions and get reimbursed by insurance companies and medicare). In the middle of the screen, in the fine print was " It appears you have successfuly completed the certification exam for a family nurse practitioner......." I started shaking- wow. Whew. Couldn't even do the dance. My husband picked me up and took me to split a burger. It was a nice day. My kids were excited. Nash wanted to do the dance when I got home. I think for him, it meant I would never again have to say- I have to study, maybe later. FNP-C. hope it is worth it. It sure does hurt some days. Then when that skinny little 86 year old man and his wife look up at you and say, we have really grown to love you with tears in their eyes-it feels right. Somebody's got to do it.

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Big Test

Okay major big test Monday at noon. If I fail I can't work in my current role until I pass. SO PLEASE PRAY around noon on Monday November 26th, If you ever even liked me just a little. I have been studying nonstop. SO this is my break. I will let you know Monday evening. Maybe Rachel will be in her own labor! You are excused from praying for me at that time if that happens, BTW. I am in San Antonio right now and Joel and the Kids are at the River walk looking at the lights. My favorite thing to do in San Antonio during any season. But it is okay cause I will pass my test, right?

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Thankful for....

Nash- my video games, candy, money, umm pizza, uhh Also for family, techno stuff. Junk food too.

Bella- I am thankful for my family, my friends, technology, my pets( still part of my family), my mommy and daddy because they let me keep my kitty. I am thankful for everything.

Mia/Rainflower- I am thankful for my family, my sun sisters, my lip gloss be poppin. Rain to dance in, Sunshine makes me smile. I love God. Road trips with Rainbow. Starberry jamfests with Jordan. Jewelry making and anything hippy with Strawberry FIelds. I am thankful I found my secret garden. Panda lets me dance in it whenever I want. I am a Senior Yay! Trips to be taken (More Europe) And chocolate.

Trish- I am grateful for love, health, kids that crack me up, a husband that sends me flowers and loves me in all my stuff, moments with people that transcend profession and role and grasp a spiritual connection. People that fight against darkness. Friends everywhere. My mattress topper. A Lover in Heaven and Savior on Earth. Travel travel travel-I love all things diverse and beautiful. Good coffee, great wine, dark beer, humor, music, stringed instruments in particular. A sense of completion. Dance.
Wordart.

Sunday, November 18, 2007

The Journey to being "real"

AS many of us try to discover the truth of what being in real relationship means, let us not forget the balance in words spoken in love and with harshness. Let us not forget that to let your guard down and reveal your thoughts and insecurities is not a license to criticize or invitation to point out fault. Sometimes as trust is established in relationship things are spoken in confidence of the context of relationship. Some words of bitterness, some words of love, some words of anger. The following is an excerpt that describes what many have been to afraid to acknowledge as they seek the truth for themsleves..............





Most of us arrive at a sense of self … only after a long journey through alien lands. But this journey bears no resemblance to the trouble-free “travel packages” sold by the tourism industry. It is more akin to the ancient tradition of pilgrimage--“a transformative journey to a scared center” full of hardship, darkness and peril.

In the tradition of pilgrimage, those hardships are seen not as accidental but as integral to the journey itself. Treacherous terrain, bad weather, taking a fall, getting lost --challenges of that sort, largely beyond our control, can strip the ego of the illusion that it is in charge and make space for the true self to emerge. If that happens, the pilgrim has a better chance to find the sacred center he or she seeks. Disabused of our illusions by much travel and travail, we awaken one day to find that the sacred center is here and now--in every moment of the journey, everywhere in the world around us, and deep in our hearts.

But before we come to that center, full of light, we must travel in the dark. Darkness is not the whole of the story-- every pilgrimage has passages of loveliness and joy--but it is the part of the story left untold. When we escape the darkness and stumble into light, it is tempting to tell others that our hope never flagged, to deny those long nights that we spent cowering in fear.

The experience of darkness has been essential to my coming into selfhood, and telling the truth about that fact helps me stay in the light. But I want to tell the truth as well: many young people today journey in the dark, as the young always have, and we elders do them a disservice when we withhold the shadowy parts of our lives. When I was young, there were few elders who were willing to talk about the darkness; most of them pretended that success was all that they had known. As the darkness began to descend on me in my early twenties, I thought that I had developed a unique and terminal case of failure. I did not realize that I had merely embarked on a journey toward joining the human race.
--Parker Palmer, Let Your Life Speak, (Somerset, NJ: Jossey-Bass, 1999) 17-19.

Sunday, October 07, 2007

Goodnight

There is this moment at the end of the day when the work is done
When the tasks are complete
When the words are all spoken
When the time to refresh has begun

The fan is whispering a delicate dance
The blankets are turned back
Inviting romance
It is not just the physicial act of desire
Much more than this
Does my heart require

It is the final intentional
act of greeting
when our bodies in marriage
are first meeting
remembering the emotion of how we began
tendering the rowing of waters rough hands

It is the breath that is taken followed by sigh
That we are one another's
Union defined

A denial in distance or time can't replace
the charge of the Lover
in your eyes in the late

Holding and being held
By the beauty of two as one
Glistens the moon and fires the sun
My lover my friend
Now you are home

And I am beside you
And all is well with my soul
The light on our faces
The love in eyes
There is no replacement for a soul mates
Good night



trishtrueblood100707

Friday, September 28, 2007

Do Something Real

Sunday, September 23, 2007

You are beautiful







Okay so visited another blog. Somehow, these three little words captivated me. It was as though my Jesus spoke them to my heart. I believe , if you just take a moment and allow yourself to look at these pictures and feel that truth. You will receive some truth about the beauty in you. This is my prayer for you all today. I will try to find that link. It is something like youarebeautiful.com.

I challenge all of you creative types and even those of you that are not. Take a picture like this, paint a picture like this, write a poem about this. Not the Christina Aguilera version. Let me know if you come up with something.

Monday, September 10, 2007

Brett Dennen - Ain't No Reason

Sunday, September 09, 2007

Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds

Friday, September 07, 2007

Life is good

Have another interview today for those of you that will see this before then. I will tell you details on this later.
I am planning a trip to the literal desert. My little grandma- that is what we call her- lives on a 40 acre ranch in south Texas. SHe has a little church there. El Voz in El Desierto. The voice in the desert. She is the cutest little thing. I just want to go hold her hand and pray with her - no kids- no husband- just me and grandma and sometimes grandpa too. You know an older gentleman once told me, " If I had just known how much my grandparents loved me, I would have sat in their lap more, spent more time with them and just loved them." I am too big for lap time, but...it is okay. I am so excited. Joel is giving me a go-study- for your- big- test - out free card. Yay! I am not sure when, but soon.
I had a great time with friends a couple of nights this past week. It made me feel like a dork for not inviting people into my life when it was so dry for so long. I truly believe God meant for us to have friends. To be-friend one another. Friendship is a choice, like love. No one is perfect or right all the time. Your friend loves you anyway. Thank you friends. I hope to see you soon- not just lip, I mean finger, uh, keyboarding service.

Monday, September 03, 2007

Soul Sister

She is one
Who holds the pain
Hold her hand
Free the rain
Of storm brewed
Shame

Soul sister

How is it that
A healing ear
Leans in closely
Without fear
Of a blood stained
Release

Soul Sister

Trust is sown
In the eyes
So kind

The pain seeker
The magnet within
Drawing lifeschrapnel
Through the skin
Without a cut

Soul sister

Soul sister
Touches the hole in your soul
And fills it
How beautiful
Are the feet of your soles
Soul sister

Eyes that see the aura of pain
Ears that hear the silent refrain
As it vibrates out of tune
With the fork set at the Table

The gift of love unspoken
The gift of listening unbroken
The present of divine embodied you
Transcending heaven
Supernatural cue
Not constant
But
Just enough

Soul Sister



trishtrueblood090307

Friday, August 17, 2007

Trip update 2

I miss my babies! I miss their faces and voices and hugs. Thanks again to all of you who have pitched in to make this vacation possible.

Okay, so I am back in Bangkok. I get to see a little bit of big city Thailand now. Leah, is kinda sick of BKK. I am amazed. It is pretty cool. I don't like big cities too much, but the food rocks. We went to one of Paul's favorite places, I seriously have never tasted more perfectly delicious flavors. And the cost........10 bucks for all of us. Wow. We may go to the tourist areas downtown and do the boat ride and stuff like that, but Joel hates that kind of thing. Leah and I are going for Tai Chi tonight. We will probably catch a movie later too. They say I have to go through the Thai movie experience. I will let you know what that means.
We lived in the San Francisco region so I was used to the train system. The sky train they have here is similar, only with video screens. The weird thing about this place is the sex tourism industry. There are so many levels to this subject. In permeates into just plain life.
We have had a good visit with our friends and have learned a lot about them as I am sure they have learned a lot about us. It is always interesting to be around other couples to glean truth about your own relationships.

As a group we are all quite vision/dream oriented. We discussed: NGO's and changing the world, Raising funds from philanthropist types, medical focus, child focus, trafficking focus, work-training projects through restaurant and food services, computer training, photography studios and tours for tourists,conservation work. Even taking abused elephants and other animals to help rehabilitate the broken hearted children taken from the sex industry. Okay, I know some of this sounds hokey, but we are a creative people and cannot help cast vision together. No we will not call it "bunnies for boys" or anything like that. But we do recognize that we were given dominion over the Earth and we would like to do as much as possible in our little fleeting lifetime to effect change for the better.

I will update more later, love you guys. T

Sunday, August 12, 2007

Trip update

Where do I begin. I have been keeping a little log and I don't have much time. But here goes. As many of you know Leah works in the social justice Non Government Organization (NGO) world, specializing in the fight against the sex trafficking of women and children.
There is a film crew here to do a documentary called The Sold project (hence the link on the side bar). I met all of these twenty- somethings on fire for this project. (Talk about make it happen non-whiners!) I went to a filming of the interview with Leah. I will upload pictures and video of this when I get home. Later that night we went to the red light district. Very profound- hence the poetry. We took one of Leah's friend, a prostitute in Pattaya to a hotel and let her share her story on film. It was done with such respect and tenderness. She shared of her pain and the beatings and the shame. She felt trapped and spoke of many hard things. Leah held her hand through the entire taping. I am always amazed by my friend's beauty. She is like a pain seeker, so that she can bring healing to those that are wounded by the burdens of their life. Anyway, you have to go to Wednesdaythemovie.com so that you can see the work of 23 year-old director Joel Hassan, who is directing this production as well. Very inspiring team.

Now to Cambodia. I guess I just did not understand this trip. I just trust my friend. So, day one we spend at the museum ( S-21) the old school that was used to house and torture the Cambodian people during the Khumer Rouge rule. SO sad, I was nauseous after viewing the documentary. Then as we walk across to the cafe we are bombarded with beggars, scarred, eyes gouged, legless, crying out. I am freaked out. I just can't go sit in a cafe and have a nice lunch. Everyone is asking what is wrong, I can't even talk. Finally, I snap at Joel for something and he yells at me and I just start bawling. I go up to the bathroom and bawl like a baby. WHew.

It took until this morning to verbalize what had happened in me. Joel and I talked about it and the truth is that I was utterly unprepared for third world country. I have so much more to share and God is definitely in this but I must go now so pray for us all, Mia was in a little accident while we have been gone, praise God for His protection. I will write more later. Love you all. Trish

Saturday, August 11, 2007

interesting

I cannot sleep
it is 2:16 Am in Bangkok
We leave for Cambodia at 5am

I am exhausted and exhilarated
I have bits and pieces and flashes
scenes of movies and thoughts and sounds of music
all artfully strung together in disillusion
I have a burden of life that is nesting in my spiritwomb

It is not one
But many

I wish I could show you...


The child smiles
The footsteps in the rain
Up to the doorway of
The drum
Gong solo
The rhythm
Cry alone

The rising of issues
That color the world
Fallen

I wish you could see
What I see
and hear as a symphony of pictures and poetry and song
fusion of all that has been locked and tucked
for release at a later date
it is Dying to be created

inanimate screams of mercy and grace
carry me
nurture me
paint me whole
dance with me
speak to me
deliver my soul
run with me
fly with me

dare me to dream
under limitless sky



trishtrueblood081107

amazing

have you ever felt as though you witnessed something magnificent
beautiful
much like the birth of a child
but different
have you ever felt significant
in a moment
as though you were given that
"fly on the wall" experience
in the making of a movement
in the changing of the world's tide
riding the upstroke of the wave
rather than being caught in an eddy of a river
today was magnificent
as connections were made
the network made to glow
with the maker's fire in the room
as you watch
metal is molded as armour
to each body present

knighted

you await
for the word of your king
heart pounding
resounding
His command
your breath is quiet
as if sound
would cause hesitation to the utterance

Go





trishtrueblood081207

Friday, August 10, 2007

We made it!

Here in Bangkok after a long flight. Just about to settle in and visit. Will post again soon. XOXOXoo

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

WrestleMania

SO my husband and son have the traditional wrestling ritual between father and son
I love it
I usually have to walk away
But I love it
Joel is "the BIG show"
Nash calls him "a little tiny baby show"
SO the other day
The whole: "You want some of this" routine starts up again
Instead of if you ask for the bull, you goanna get the horns
Nash comes up with, " you ask for the cow you goanna get the milk!"

Thailand trip

SO here we are
The morning to drop off the kids for my long awaited
Highly anticipated
Overly glamorized
Possibly sensationalized
Trip overseas
Hmmm
Okay so, call me a freak
36 year old virgin of overseas travel
Nervous to leave my children
WOndering if I should have done more
Special stuff
Written them hidden notes
Given them meaningful trickets
Organized their stuff better
I feel like God is having me deal with my fears
I feel like He is saying
You cannot serve me to your calling if you guard the fears in your heart
Rather than release yourself to me
I believe that Bob Marley was on to something when he said
"Emanicipate yourselves from mental slavery
None but ourselves can fee our minds"
Father can give you grace to accomplish this?
Yes, but yours must be a willing journey to the altar or sacrificial death of self.
When I could not go on the medical trip to Cambodia cause I missed it by a school week, I felt reminded by Him of my "fear baby"
Like the tar baby that sticks to your hands in angry jabs
Fear baby held me back
I needed to choose freedom to trust His perfect will
To follow Him without orchestrating my own protective patterns
And false death
Replayed, looped on what-if-film
Today is a journey unlike any other in my life
Not for the geographic location
It is a circumcision of sorts
Yes, I will trust, increase my faith to trust.

Sunday, August 05, 2007

I am officially God's favorite (at least in my world)

SO Wednesday was the LAST DAY of school!
Many thanks to those of you supportive in this area.

SPECIAL THANKS to Brandi WILSON aka Brandelicious, Branderrific, Brantastica, WOnderBran, SupercaliBRanderrificexpialidocious- for ALL of the special things you did to encourage, lift me, love me and be my friend. Jesus loves you. And so do I.

WARNING: Next lines quite mushy.

Husband:
Words cannot adequately express all of the thanks in my heart to you, my one true love. Even when we are in a funky time. I always yearn for you by my side- but when it is good- it is REAL good and I am looking forward to spending the rest of my days loving you.

TO my children that read this Blog. I adore you and pray that I can be here for you like never before. You are my lovelies.

THis week has been awesome. ERICA exercised her YogalateeTaiCHi moves with me.- Then we had a celebratory margarita.
We had dinner with Andrea and Hubby. SOOOOooo good.
Then GOD smiled upon me.
Saturday morning. Phone call. " I know this is short notice but- would you like a free hundred dollar ticket to see Don Henley?"

Are you serious?
My friend drove me to the Don Henley, Stray Cats, Pretenders show- It was exquisite and lovely. I know this sounds weird, but I was loving and worshipping God to the grooves of "Heart of the Matter" and "New York Minute", man oh man, it was sweet. I felt so miraculously blessed. I have not been to a real concert in about ten years. Can I just say one more thing?
AS wonderful as that was. This morning during a particular song- I realized that nothing in the world could equate with actively seeking my Father's heart, to pursue Him as His daughter and praise Him. Wow.
I did some entirely cool and lovely and fun things. But nothing is as beautiful as when I believe in Jesus. SO I wrote a song:

Today Praise

Today
New Day
I am in love with you again
Old song
Made new again
Simply by the flow of love for you

Do you hear
Past the words
Can I contain the best to give to you
Praise High
Praise Now
Praises lifted in this song to you

You have shown
As we join
What it is to freely love alone
You have made
My life alive
To your call
I now must rise
Not as a debt
To fulfill
But as desired depths revealed


I didn't know that on the earth
I could know your love so sweetly birthed
Fully formed
To you complete
This redemption
Now so sweet

Praise High
Praise Now
Praises lifted in this song to you

I didn't know that I was worth
The love you've given me
I didn't know
I didn't know
Please forgive me
I didn't know

Praise High
Praise Now
Praises lifted in this song to you
Praise High
Praise Now
Praises lifted in this song to you
Praise High
Praise Now


SO this is Post 100
May HIs face shine upon you that you might know the full measure of His love. TrishTrueblood

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Seeing the unseen

It never ceases to amaze me the work accomplished through an exhausted , but willing vessel

I can never "see" how it will be done
I can only trust that it will
What portion of perfect physical human vision does the eye allow?

Faith, an unseen frontier of possibilites
Faith, an unseen source of strength
Faith, an unseen supply of provision
Faith, tangiable as a bright fruit glistening in the dew of the morning rays and the leaves that quiver with the tenderly lavishing stroke of a summer wind
Would you have believed the package that labeled the seed had you not tasted the sweetness?
Carry me weightless into the sunrise of a new day of Trust and Belief




PMT071707

Answered Prayers Rock



Sometimes I get stressed
School is consuming
Giving my time is challenging
Spending time with Him
Is always worth it



Today, was one of those
Before the performance mode
Gotta get it done
At home
At work
At school
I needed some love



Today my Loving Father
Gave me love
In the form of A friend, or two
My man
My children
The sweetest
Neatest
Needed
Cards
Thank you
Love Rocks

Saturday, July 14, 2007

Vintage Sesame Street - Rubber Duckie (Ernie)

SO I am a little nostalgic for my childhood these days.

Friday, July 13, 2007

Love me

Hear me today as I plea for your presence
Lonesome and awkward
I bend my breathe toward heaven
I am spent and ask for you
Love me with your love
Strengthen me with your strength
Peace from above
Grace me with your grace
Dwell in me that I might overflow
Instead of a rocky riverbed with skelton exposed
Tender is the mouth of a lover so giving
Tender is the love from the mouth of the Spirit
Speaking sweet songs soul fulfilling
I yearn for you
Dare me to dance
Take my hands and my heart
Begin the romance
Lover of men, women, children and life
I lift my hands to your praise
At burdens demise


PMT071307

Monday, July 09, 2007

Beautiful Wedding

Sometimes being a caterer isn't all bad. We have great people that work with us. We put out a great product. And on the occassion we get to listen to really cool music( GREAT band). I am just grateful. I know everyone sacrificed to stay out late and help us put on a good show. I feel very blessed today. Special Thanks to Aaron and Erica. I love your ethic, talents and heart. And I am not just being a 'gold digger' on command. I mean it.
Gotta get back to work......

Sunday, July 08, 2007

BAd Nght...Good Morning

Yeah, I guess we all have some.
Stress the not so final frontier,
to boldly go where most men, women and heart attack victims have gone before.
With a clenched jaw and too much to do
I ask GOd to get it outta me
I ask him to fix me already
It gets very heavy to hold my baggage.
He reminds me of the day I checked my baggage
And the day I jumped over the counter, stole the key and recovered my own baggage to help HIM with my burdensome load
oh yeah....
Would you could you take them back?
"IN a box, with a fox, in the air"
"All your cares"
"Feel better?"
"MMhmm"
"You are my girl"
Sweetest Daddy.

Thursday, July 05, 2007

CCRC slogans





Thanks you visionary photographers for the donation to the cause. If these pictures look familiar it is because they are. Call me an opportunist exploiting the talents of others. Eventually I will edit them a little better. Or better yet, if Erica ever has time- she can make them Beautiful. Sorry, I can't help myself, I want to surround myself with beautiful artists and visionaries,writers and speakers and leaders. You girls inspire me. Thanks again Becky and Francesca.

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Freedom Thoughts

Today, a funny thing happened. We were given a full size bed for our ten year old. On the way to pick it up, we ran out of gas. I called the house thinking how great it is to have my big girl back. She could come pick us up and take us for gas. No answer after like a hundred rings. I asked Joel, the chronic leave-the-phone-outside-guy, "Did you leave it outside?" When suddenly our eyes were drawn to the console in the truck. There sat my phone, Joel's phone and......the house phone. Okay plan B. Call Aaron our good buddy that is one of the most kingdom, neighbor friends ever. Voicemail. Plan C. Thank God for Plan C. Do you think Erica might be working in the CCRC to get her Art show together? Yes. Erica to the rescue. Mia to the rescue. Meanwhile, I was left in charge of the truck and trailer on the highway. When, in my solitude I began to hear this......


As I sit in the car, my mind wonders
I reflect on deep breathing instructions I have given to my patients
I believe deep breathing is important for health
Physically and spiritually
I take in several very long breaths and carefully release the air

I am alive
I am present
Aware of the noise
And the cars and trucks
Creating vibration against the air that pushes the truck
The mini rush as each airwave passes

I think of fear
Experienced by all who have been aware
Of their death as it comes
Of the last breath in this world
Then black out, white out, fade away

All those insecurites and uglies within like...
I never got to have that kind of wedding
Or those kinds of friends
Or that kind of house
Or money
Or this or that or the other

Means nothing
My ugliness and selfishness ripped away clean
Outweighed by the sweetness and love of my God, husband and children
Sublime connections and transference of energy
Between glory and painful bondage
Tender touch in times framed by remembrance

How can a word describe, how can a dance, how can art, how can this life express?

I hear little voices rising up from the silence.
"She is here, they exclaim!"
"We have been waiting so long."
They dance around me awaiting my complete or even partial awareness of my surrounding
I am celebrated and loved fully
Every point composing my being, matched and overcome

At first I am startled and disoriented
Then I slowly rise and look at he hands of my "body"
They are so delicate yet so commanding
I look at my feet bare and elegant
I notice the material against my "body"
It is fine, threads magnetically sewn together brilliant
I feel beautiful and powerful and tender and lovely
I feel peace and wonder and excitement
I feel no pain, no shame, no me in flesh
Just beautiful glorious freedom divine

Who knew there would be so much freedom in death of flesh
As I breathe a breath of life anew
Breath of God flow
Release what is true


Trish Trueblood 4 July 2007

Sunday, July 01, 2007

Madness

You know those moments in movies like the Matrix where the kicks are thrown and the slow motion/fast motion cinematography comes into play and it is like treading air. That is what I feel like right now. Except, the air is not very thick here and the shoes I am wearing aren't made for air treading. Plus I am not exactly sure, but I am pretty sure I can't do the Jackie Chan splits in mid air. AS I drove to and from Dallas I was listening to all kinds of "old" music. And lots of 90's hits too. You know like Blind Melon and the Cranberries. I even listened to a Lionel Richie song all the way through. Either I am getting really old or just really nostalgic and mushy, maybe I could blame it on being a girl. Anyway, I think when school is out I am going to throw myself into the creative. I feel like this last great push of BORING work is squeezing me. I want to play the mandolin, dance for real, paint and draw, speak extremely beautiful Spanish. ( my Tex- TEX/ mex just doesn't quite do it for me.) Hey guys, four weeks til school is over. Can anyone say PARTY? I don't know. I am not going to walk the stage in August, cause of the whole Thailand trip thing. Oh darn did I mention THAILAND again? MUFASA. Ah nevermind, I am just getting serious short timers- having trouble concentrating. I have been working on a series of Posters for the Community Resource Center. The theme is, Got Food? Got Clothes? Got Health? I am trying to find super cute pictures of kids in big clothes and with food all over their faces. I am excited about our little center. Joel has been working like a madman to get the center painted and cleaned out. Anyway, my head is over here trying to focus and my feet are over there trying to walk on invisible, go figure, or at least pray.

Thursday, June 28, 2007

Flight Interrupted

AHHHHHHHHH! That is my frustration. Mia's flight from Philly to DFW is cancelled- bad weather- she has to sleep in the airport or stand in the two hour line for standby and possibly still sleep in the airport. Please pray for my baby's protection. Nash was saying, "Mom she is almost an adult!' I told him that I didn't care if she was eighty, I will always be a mom to my kids when they need me. I was totally strong and praying and fine and then after the second hour on the phone with people telling me it was not their problem I started to cry. Then finally someone logged in to a computer told me she would be in Dallas at midnight. Yeah! Then the next thing I know Mia is calling back saying she is still in the airport! Thus you got the silent scream.
The next time I taked to her she was not upset anymore and had gotten a flight at 7 AM. Lord Jesus protect my baby. Cover her. Place your hedge of protection around her. Send Angels to stand guard and allow your strength to rise up in her. She can do anything equal to any thing through you that infuse inner strength into her. Your grace is sufficient for Mia. And Mom too. Let her be a blessing to every frustrated person around her.

UPDATE: We are all home safe and sound- thanks you guys. It is too funny that she went to Europe- 10 cities in 17 days - smooth sailing- until she reaches the States. Mia is 17 y.o. and well on her way to figuring life out for herself. No matter how much I tried to protect her from the big bad ugly world she still had to figure out what to do all on her lonesome. She passed the life test. Whew. Way to go Mia. Way to go God!

Sunday, June 24, 2007

Rainchild

Tonight my children delighted in the rain. I was hot and tired, cleaning out a stuffy dirty room. I went outside to make sure they were not doing anything bad or dangerous. Nash was running around soaking wet in the rain, barefoot, grinning the only way a seven year old boy with one front tooth could, ear to ear. I started to tell them- Bella was with him, to get out of the rain- at least put shoes on. What a party pooper. My husband reminded me to let them be kids and have fun. So I went outside, stepped out from under the awning, and let the rain trickle the big drops on my sweaty head. I said, "The rain feels really good on your head." Nash ran out with his arms spread wide, Bella was dancing and singing in the background, then Nash said, " The rain feels good all over your body." That kid really knows how to live. Why is it so hard for me to cut loose and be a fun mom. I am a true goofball sometimes- then I get all rigid and my face puckers up- yuk. I wannna get all wet, need to get all wet. Then maybe I can just pucker from the moisture instead of the sour in my soul. Gotta breathe long breath phewww!

Rural Time

So part of our program means time in a rurual health facility. I get to sleep in a hospital bed, eat hospital food and go to the ER and see patients as they come in. Sometimes busy, sometimes not. I have really been affected by the teenage pregnancy epidemic in this community. I am going to do a little research on it. Part of it is a poverty culture. They get to have something that belongs to them. It just breaks my heart to see an eleven year old in the ER with her 15, 17 year old cousins that are both having babies- yes more than one. It is not like these are accidents. They are planned pregnancies. ( NOt the eleven year old). I just want to pull her to the side and hold her in her innocence. I just want to tell her it is not okay to have sex right now. Sex is for marriage and it is a sacred and beautiful gift - not to be entered into casually.I want to warn her of the possibilities of things that she could experience. I just want to tell her about hope in Jesus and His plans for her life. About his complete and satisfying love. And then the reality of the next patient being here waiting to be seen, stings my eyes, while the little girl obediantly slips into the car with her PG cousin and her smoking grandmother. The silent sermon swallowed in regret. God please help these babies having babies.

Saturday, June 23, 2007

Busy little bee



So much to do so little time. Update ya later.

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Lightening Night



I am driving home in the evening rain
That separate soul of a poet calls my name beckoning me toward the horizon
I have to go home and feed my family
I don't have time to pull over on that hill and watch the electricity map the sky
I am late for dinner
The music becomes more noticeable
The classical rhythms are mysteriously in tune with the streaks of light across a cloud filled sunset

I cannot take this evening for granted
I pull up to the driveway fully involved with the stage of His presence
The music heightening with the intensity of the lights and softening with the beads of rain turn to mist
A head pops out as they have been waiting
I extend an invitiation to the ultimate laser light show as my seven year old boy and ten year old girl climb into the front seat
We have our drive-thru dinner theatre together as I am parked in reverse, positioned anticipation
My son exclaims excitement
We sit for a few more moments capturing forever with our nets of remembrance
It is a sweet life

A little wonder and awe shining and striking
Dangerous to some and beautiful to others
Awesome, to others still
Where do you find your heart and mind in the lightening of life?
Fearful for the possibility or excited at the majesty?
Where do you find yourself?
I find myself riding the raindrops fallen to splash
Absorbed with the morning sun
Taken to heights unseen
Entered into the process undone
Embedded in the clouds
Provision of the water that is needed for life
Entering the dance of the cycle of giving
Forming and crashing that others might go on living

We are dash, bleep, fleet and flash
No time to worry or pile the trash
Release now the glory
Fear not the shine
Dance with a vengence
Sing without rhyme
Color the Lover's Crest on your life

Trish Trueblood

Friday, June 08, 2007

More Randomoniums

Okay Clinicals have started for me and I have- as is the norm for me, taken about seventeen projects simultaneously. I could use some Amanda in me right now! Wouldn't it be cool if we could switch powers like Pokemon or something and just said Power of Organization! Power of ______! Okay so maybe I should be asleep but I am not so there you have it.
I am in the last eight weeks as a student. I will not be nervous. I will not feel inadequate or stupid. I will not be slow when I am finished with this program. I will pass my certification exam. Okay, whew! I am confessing before I get in too deep and the old nature tries to tell me I am drowning. So, in essence I am leaving a trail of breadcrumbs. By the way the end of last semester was the best end of semester I have ever had with regard to the "girl formerly riddled with anxiety."

Kids off to FGF Church camp at 0815, TO clinical with Andrea C at ( as soon as I get there. A meeting with administration at ARMC at 1100am. Back to Andrea's office. By the way- God is so great that he gave me Andrea to precept me. Feeling very fortunate. She is one of the sweetest, most compassionate, cutest and smartest nurse practitioners ever! SO I have not decided how long to be there cause I have a date with a girlfriend that shall remain nameless. I just don't want anyone to think I am playing favorites or anything. No kids no husband just dinner and movie and probably a footrub or two. Nice. Then back to the house cause somewhere in the afternoon before returning to Clyde I will go and purchase a gift for the Kim Peters Bridal Shower (that is going to be awesome). Julie has put it together at the lovely Wendy's house for Sat 10AM. Then I will be off to Fredericksburg to take my husband to Father's day dinner. We will be too busy next week and I will probably just let the kids cook- the old breakfast in bed routine. We will leave Fred to make it back in time for church hopefully. Then- we start over. More deadlines for these research studies. More required reading. More demands on the Trishmeister ( some self inflicted). Just give me some garden time Lord.

I have been waiting for the poetry brewing in me to release the love and communion I feel with the Father in the garden. I might do that later. I will do that later. But right now can I just describe some of the elements in the coming poem? Like you are going to stop me somehow.

The weeping willow sits in the corner of the fenced off metal links. Out of place for such a regal fellow. So old and unkept He has been trying to die. I have been praying for new life in this tree and my garden. I have declared that it will live longer that my family's family. The reason? I have never gardened until this year. I went outside with a vengence. I dug and raked and together my husband and children to one measure or another helped create this space and stage for the creative to be birthed. You see I do not take life lightly. I cannot have anymore children physically. But something about planting and germinating seeds in the " tummy of the earth" and watching them rise. Listening to the rustling leaves on the branches of the great tree and standing close enought to hear the crackling of the water as it trickles back into the soil- divinity. It is heaven on Earth. It is a Kingdom come moment in my life, every day I am out there. There is a peace that is almost overwhelming. I am so filled with love and purpose. God dwells in this place with me. There is no need to speak. Lest it be to my babies growing so strong or sometimes broken by the chickens. My heart is with His Heart if but for a few minutes. It is exquisite.

I love my children. I am very affectionate with them. But I struggle creating those moments with them. They are my legacy, they are my gift. Yet I lose time with them regularly. I feel like a "boring" mom. Not because they say anything. I know they love me but if anyone has any suggestioins on how to have fun more- without chuck e cheese or mr gatti's or constant money sucking themes- please suggest away!

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

Women In Art

Do you see yourself? Your sister, your mother, daughter.....

Monday, June 04, 2007

Justice



Seek Justice
Rescue the Oppressed
Defend the Orphan
Plead for the Widow
Isaiah 1:17

So what of our mission here. Mission Planet Earth? Mission United States, Mission Texas, Mission Clyde? Or is there a border? Are we comfortably complacent? Is it okay to be so focused on our freedom from the constraints of our own minds that we are inadvertantly missing a greater calling to set the captives free? I am sometimes confused by the greater good and my personal convictions. I hate it when some book or truth is thrown in my face and I am forced to rexamine my positions. Actually, I don't hate it. It just feels so damn uncomfortable to think that I am not fulfilling my purpose. So the book is called Terrify No More by Gary A. Haugen- International Justice Mission.

Let me give you some fuel for the fire of intentional activity....

"All that is necessary for the triumph of Evil is for Good men to do nothing." Edmund Burke

"I am frequently amazed at my own shrunken circle of compassion, especially when I come from a faith tradition that teaches again and again of God's great compassion and passion-for the world. I am enamored with the shriveled world of me and mine......I have a poverty of compassion." Gary Haugen

"The second poverty is a poverty of purpose. I marvel at the way forces conspire to bend the purpose of my life toward increasingly petty things and away from the grander purposes outside myself for which I sense I was truly fashioned by the maker." Gary Haugen

" We must picture hell as a state where everyoneis perpetually concerned about his own dignity and advancement, where everyone has a grievance, and where everyone lives the deadly serious passions of envy, self-importance, and resentment." C.S. Lewis

"The third poverty is a poverty of hope.....we underestimate the value of what God has given us to transform lives. We underestimate the value of a single human life." Gary Haugen

" While there are millions of girls and women victimized everyday, our work will always be about the one. The one girl deceived. The one girl kidnapped. The one girl raped. The one girl infected with AIDS. The one girl needing a rescuer.To succumb to the enormity of the problem is to fail the one. And more is required of us.......There are millions they say, what is the point of one. 'I think Elisabeth understands the point. Elisabeth is the point.' " Sharon ? Attorney at IJM.

IJM has categorized the work they do. (1) Free the victims(2)Prosecute the perpetrators(3) secure places of safe aftercare for victims(4) transform communities so the injustice is not acceptable any longer.

Wow. It is with great caution they accomplish their goals. The work is very well orchestrated and well-researched.
Is it possible to consider that within each of us we are called to the same level of accomplishment-just specific to that which we are called. To that which we are chosen. We are a chosen people.

SO for me...(1) Identify people in need of food, clothing, healthcare (2) Offer assitance and resourcing to provide these items(3)secure places of safe counsel and demostrate the love of Christ(4) transform communities so that the denial of these basic physical and spiritual needs are no longer evident(5) Network communities of believers that share some common vision in the desire to seek justice for those involved.

Thursday, May 31, 2007

Jennifer Peña-Como Entender (Cumbia)

This is one of her video's- I might convert some of you lovely diverse peoples, (I stand corrected ; ) ).

Going to a celebrity wedding,oooohh, ahhhh






My cousin, Jennifer Pena, is a Tejano star, Google her. I am really proud of her. She is way younger than me and we were never really all that close, but, hey, she is blood. She is getting married this weekend and I made the list, yay! I get to see how the other half lives. This should be sweet. I am really excited because I get to see lots of family I have not seen in years. I get to visit with my little grandma, that by the way is the pastor of a little church in South Texas. I miss them soo much. This is going to be great. I will try to sneak a camera in. Or at least get some side shots.

Monday, May 28, 2007

My heart is bursting with a song of joy!



My Daughter Mia makes me so proud!

Today she went to State competition as a soloist. She went to state last year too. Last year she was so nervous and left in tears- this year she had a Godly confidence.
Today, I had a vision of angels sewing golden stings onto her vocal chords.
Today, I praise God for giving Mia the desires of her heart.
Today, is a gift from God to a daughter and the heart of a mother.

She got a ONE! High score.

I know there are other things to pray for
I know there is death and destruction
However
Today, we celebrate the freedom of song
Our soldiers have fought and died to give us this gift of life
Today, I am grateful for those who lost their lives
Lost time with their families
Were injured or wounded
For the sake of this country and my family

Today we celebrate the song of life!



p.s. Congrats to Courtney Lane as well! Another number one!

Monday, May 21, 2007

Garden Mama- maybe be the birth of a new blog.


( These are actually Mia's Sunflowers I have nt taken any pictures of mine yet.)

As I have watched our video at Erica's blog an unknown number of times. I am at a loss for words. At least specific words. I guess, since I have a garden now, and God gives me an infinite number of pictue paralells in the garden I will use the analogy of the radish.
Being a rooky gardener, I planted radish among other yummy things. I don't remember how many days to germination or how many days to harvest, I just dug out the weeds, laid the compost and dirt in my little raised beds and sowed seed. I decreed frutifulness over our property and declared the glory of God in Clyde and specifically - my garden. Guess what? It rained and rained and rained. Everytime I made a little addition to my garden family, He did it again. He really is faithful to see a good work to completion. Then it happened, the sprouts bursting through the soil. Little infants in the ground. SO curious to see the maker. Not me. The creator. God.They were gorgeous and me- proud mama. Anyway, just one little problem. Too many seeds- too close together. Surely they could not produce fruit- or at least radish which techincally is a root. SO guess that means Garden Mama (GM) must fix it. GM must move her babies for their own protection. Only, I think I pulled them a wee bit too soon. SO the new row is looking wimpy. There was so much goodness at BFW. I am needing to rearrange my spirit man to make room for all the seedlings of truth to take root- not go into shock and they must reach the highest heights. SO that they can not only produce fruit, but eventually go to seed and reproduce around them. Now there are weeds that crop up to try to steal nourishment on the occassion. But the gates of hell will not prevail in my garden. Not physically or spiritually. NO weapon!
The experiences I had this weekend surpassed any other in the intensity of my passion for Him. Wow! How about you- how is your heart now?

Sunday, May 20, 2007

Change



Coming soon to a neighborhood near you. Came this weekend wrapped up in intimate healing, sealed with a bliss. Describe to you later. Peace.

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Random Stuff



I thought this was a beautiful picture of my parents.

I passed the semester! Eight weeks to go. Countdown to graduation.

I got my tickets to Thailand and Cambodia in August. Woohoo! I met Joel 15 years ago this year. We get to have a honeymoon. We are so excited. This is an odd year for a honey moon, 11 years married in July, but who cares!I am going to Thailand.

In January I was so bummed. I felt outed by God, like I was intentionally excluded from the medical mission trip. I felt really wintery and buried. Well, I figured out that I was excluded. It was not my time. He had other plans for me. He knows best for me. And guess what? He was right. Go figure. The creator of the universe knows what it right for me. I am so happy that all the things I have dreamed of are coming to pass. So, three weeks to chill. I am excited about working a little, not just for the cash, but because there it feels good to love strangers. People are scared in the hospital and I am there so infrequently these days, I can really love them. I am full to love them. In the past having a job as a nurse burnt me. I worked myself to nothing. I was in a vacuum. I work way less now and feel so free. I don't have it all. But I am blessed.

Saturday, May 05, 2007

Beautiful


Me and my man at the Soft ball tournament on Fri evning
I had a beautiful day. I woke up at six this morning and said goodbye to my big girl as she drove to her job. I laid in bed for 8 more minutes and talked to God, mostly it was just whisperings. I woke up my next child and had her get ready for Softball tournament. Dropped her off and went to buy fruit and snacks for the day. Her team won the first two games, lost the third and fourth. BUT- she hit her first homerun today. Too cool! It was so fun to see her own suprise as she came home. We ran to the store after the last game and got Nash and Bella new outfits, ran over to Candy's and changed, jumped in the car and went to the FGF Missions banquet.Joel prepared food from all the nations supported tonight- I did not get to taste any it all- after all I was late.


The auction items were superb. The tables were beautifully decorated. The feature speaker Randy Boyd of Prepare International was such a beautiful man of God. He is so in love with the purpose of his life, to fellowship with God and bring others into the fellowship of God. He gave many examples of extravagant love he had witnessed. I was able to speak with many people that are beautiful to me. Kind hearts and givers, servants and missionaries. It was sweet. I think

The biggest thing for me today was
To hear the heart of God for me
To hear his love for me again, today
To be called again
To be chosen again
Yes, I know the first time is so special
But as anyone who is married knows-
To be chosen again and again by someone you love
Only knits your heart more tightly
Only weaves the stitches more securely
Until your heartbeat truly is one
For that moment
Your name is called, whispered
And the joy of knowing how much you are loved returns
It is passionate
It is a wax and wane of intimacy
Even in a room filled with people
It is your little secret garden
If but for a moment, in the spirit lease on earth
It is a deposit on an eternal purchase in the heavenlies

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Comic relief

SO this morning I have reconsolidated my student loan- we will just call it a second mortgage. Faxed, received faxes, emailed, thought about the rescource center funding, staff for Tru Blu Catering, nominated an employee for an award, worked on a paper for school, took my niacin and aspirin, got the kids off to school, won the best wife in the morning award, and worked on this research study thing that takes too long to explain. I thought I could uses some R and R. All I got was this......

If you ever feel a little stupid, just dig this up and read it again; you'll begin to think you're a genius

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(On September 17, 1994, Alabama's Heather Whitestone was selected as Miss America 1995.)
Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever,"
--Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest.
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"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff."
--Mariah Carey
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"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life,"
-- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign.
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"I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body,"
--Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.
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"Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country,"
--Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC. ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

"That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it,"
--A congressional candidate in Texas.
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"Half this game is ninety percent mental."
--Philadelphia Phillies manager, Danny Ozark
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"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's ! the impu rities in our air and water that are doing it."
--Al Gore, Vice President
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"I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix."
--Dan QuayleI>
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"We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?"
--Lee Iacocca
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"The word "genius" isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."

--Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback & sports analyst.
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"We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people."
-- Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instrutor.
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"Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances."
--Department of Social Services, Greenville, South Carolina
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"Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas."
--Keppel Enderbery
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"If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record."
--Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman
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Feeling smarter yet?

Sunday, April 29, 2007

Amazing

God is so amazing to me. The testimonies and revelations given to others in the Body of Christ are unsettling to my status quo. I love moving forward to a heightened intimacy with the Father. I love to yearn for His face to shine upon me. I die to sit in His Presence in the throne room of praise and prayer, love and peace.

And then in the other room, kids won't stay in bed. But hey am I blessed or what?

Simple Joy



As I entered the room everyone was seeking
The presence of the Holy Spirit was Fertile
I sat and the words came to me as though in a dream
" I am alive!"
Flew above my head
Scrolling through the ceiling window

"Where do you love me?" He spoke to my heart.

In a prom dress flowing?
In a field of flowers?
In a wedding dress?
On the golf course?
In a fishing boat?
In the mundane daily rowing?
On the hunt?
In the nails and screws?
Nuts and bolts?
Files and trials?
Shots and droughts?

Or is joy in the daily dishes?

Simple Joy

"I want to frame my joy in the dance of your life."
"In your song of life you may or may not ever 'sing'
For the world
With your Voice
But you will sing For Me
In your Worship
You will sing in our Promise
Of Love
That is Strength and Honor
And Tender Mercy
And ALWAYS ready for you to receive me
Excited to be intimate
With Me

I will give you more than a promise
I will give you the keys to the kingdom...



A word of pregnancy was spoken
A word of birth soon come
The waters would be broken
Creativity undone
From bondage bound up tight
Hidden from light's eyes
The head crowns to reveal
Freedom's precious sons to rise




Trish Trueblood

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

I am a grandmother!


Gotcha! I have actually been a build a bear grandmother for a while now. My kids are fascinated with these ridiculous bears. SO Nash recently went to San Antonio with my husband. For some reason he decided to spoil the boy and take him to Build-a-Bear. On the way home Nash calls me and says, "Mom,you are a grandma again! I got a girl this time. I always wanted a daughter!" He is seven. Geeze. I am too young for this. Okay so maybe I am not.No wise cracks about my teenager either ;)

Monday, April 16, 2007

kaliedoscopepeople



peoplearekaleidoscope
humansedges
overlappingformingbeauty
orcontrasting
differentshapesandshades
outlinedbyeyesthattwist
thepiecesoftheeyes
perceivingyetanothermove
ormoodorgroove
comecloserlayercorners
nearthebeamoflightthatenters
atthecenterofthehollowend
thatalignssowecanhaveourmomentshine
NOWSHAKE



trishtrueblood

Thursday, April 12, 2007

The Void




“You were a quiet little girl- do you remember me when you were little?”
“No, you worked a lot.”

******************************
The Void: A Silent Conversation


Where were you when she was born?
I was working, well I was there for a little while
I remember her when they handed her to me
She smiled
Have you ever seen a newborn smile?

I had to work
I needed insurance
They all needed insurance.
What about when she crawled for the first time?
When she took her first steps?
Said her first words?
I did breast feed her for six months
I pumped as long as I produced milk
I didn’t notice that she was really hungry until she started smacking her lips when people were eating around her
She was beautiful
I remember her little white and pink face
Her black tuft of hair
She was so sweet
She grew fast
She was wild
Not like the first
She was unpredictable
Red boots in training pants
Climbing fences
I wrote a country song about her once, I didn't even like country

Fast forward……more void

Working again?
Didn’t stop, just more hours, needed the money, who doesn’t?
Too tired to notice new teeth
She slept through the night very early- I worked nights
She was quiet
I didn’t teach her much after moon and nose and eyes
She went to a decent school
I didn’t read much more than Runaway Bunny and Goodnight Moon
Dr Seuss was always fun

What about the others?
Oh.
They are also a blur, a shadow, pictures jog a little.

Why is it that time goes so fast when you look back, but so slowly while you are watching the sand fall, day in day out?
If I could go back in time…I would do it differently
I would remember not to forget all the firsts and lasts
I would enjoy more than complain
I would talk to and not at
I would listen to them and look into their eyes
Pleading with them to be filled with the sense of my love
I am their mother
I want good things for them
I was wrong in that other life
I cannot undo being gone

God help me to be present in the now of what you have given me
Help me not to hurt over failures and indifference of the past
Help me to be strong in standing in the center of your fountain of love in my family
In my place
My home
It is not a prison
It is a gift
It is your gift to me
Thank you
As I stroke their sleeping cheeks and tears roll gently into tomorrow’s lifewave
Let me ride high on the surfboard of motherhood
High Tide
Good ride…..No Fear




Trish Trueblood

Monday, April 09, 2007


png file by flyguydesigns.com


I can see you tucked behind the seemingly warm petal-blanket of the flowers
I can see your hands pulling on the fine linens of the rose
I can see your sihlouette dancing in the morning sunlight
I can see the dust of dreams falling from your feet
I can see you trying to be hidden from the world that would deny you
I can see you with my hidden eyes that need not look to find you
Can you see me as I see you?
Tucked and pulling
Dancing and dreaming
Hidden, yet seen.

trishtrueblood

Saturday, April 07, 2007

spaghetti a la frantasticara


Well, I know there have been some dashed hopes in many lives. Meanwhile there have also been some big blessings. More importantly, for the purposes of this blog there have been some neighborly blessings going on around Sunset drive. SO there are some days during the week we affectionately call scrounge night. Usually, I am tired, Joel is busy or gone and well whatever we find in the cabinet or freezer is for supper.
This blog is a shout, clap and spin for some neighborly spaghetti via the Hafner house. Let me tell you what ( like the old timers in Clyde say) that girl can cook. Thanks Fran, once again you have confirmed your title. Frantastic. All you other shmo's except Erica ( cause she wouldn't like it anyway) eat your heart out.

And He said, "Love your neighbors...." some have an easier job than others.

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

SpringPics





Tuesday, March 27, 2007

CenterHouse

Not mine. Not yours.
Ours?
Needs.Theirs.
Bleeds for love.
Reaks of hope.
Dreams deferred, dreams confirmed.
Community unity?
To be or maybe not?

Gathering covering for warmth
Provision will abound
Gathering sticks build vision
Faithful hear the sound

Pipes are used to transfer from one to another
Taking from abundance to distribute for mother, sister, brother.
Underground. Alternative. Off the grid. No chart.
Father please hear my plea
Fill up this cart.

We can sow
In the flow
Pass the Salt down river
Firelight in the dark
Shines bright beyond the quiver
Straighten backs you arrows

Lift your heads you gates
Open up your eyes
See the dead before you
Breathe life from bones that dried
Tables are all set
To greet the King of Kings

Saturday, March 24, 2007

Poet People


photojpaulcypert

This one goes out to my poetry people
Sneaking to write that thought in the night
Highways and byways that muse with your mind
Flowers and stars and someone's huge behind
Kids that don't baaa
And some that do
Food that is smeared and
Green colored pooh
Intently and fiercely
Wringing inspiration
Finding your rhythm
Spelling the nations
Water and nature and how the cock crows
Pork rinds and school time and how the wind blows
Some may touch you, some in despair
Some may inspire you to change what you wear
Some may be serious
Some just plain fun
Some somewhat sickly under the gun
Mostly I love you, my people that write, or photo or make things
that bring peace to that fight
That place in the core of you
Art won't let you stop
And the room may smell sweeter if you decided to mop
But smell the rose and tell the nose how to fall in love
with a scent that's not spent on springs' window shut closed

Oil the hinges
A season is new
Blow in sweet spirit
Rise mine to the kite
You'll find a wineskin that's stretched and oiled and ready
For the harvest to be poured in
As you will walk steady
Or dance in position
Oh how I love you my friends,peeps and tribe
You just make me grateful and happy to be alive

Trish Trueblood

Friday, March 16, 2007

Conductor of Praise

Conductor of praise
That is what I am
I can wave my arms like a madman
Frantically freakish
Look at me God
I am not sheepish
I can wear my tuxedo
My proper primness so stuffy
I can intimidate the audience with my pompous ruffles so fluffy

Conductor of praise
That is what I am
I can choose to be trained
By the work of His hands
I can yield all my muscles
To respond to His usher
I can, with each motion
Wield force to the gust of Glorious Bluster

Conductor of Praise
Bring the Kingdom to Earth
Those who have eyes
And those who have ears
Pray scales will fall fiercley
As heaven reveres
The Creator
The Maker
The God over all

Conductor of praise
To my knees
To the ground
To my agenda's death
Fall without sound
Take my wand and break it
As you show me the way
To love my neighbor
Foregoing the stage

To usher in sweetly
To love and be loved
To trust and be trusted
With the peace of a dove




Trish Trueblood

Monday, February 26, 2007

Kite

Flying high
The child smiles
Lifted up under tufts of breeze
A sneeze of wonder
In the pollens of spring
The string extends from his hand
He manuevers position
To gain his command
Reeling and feeling the winds as they change
Rising to heights
Holding the reigns
Walking backwards and forwards, dancing in spades
Blue skies and a tail
That demands your gaze
As you walk in the park
And the sun comes to rest
The dragon of colors gently descends
Daddy and Mommy are ready to go
The boy wishes silent for time to move slow
For him this string is more than a leash
It is a connection with more than the grown-ups can see
It is a world of adventure and courage and wars in the sea
The castles are calling for victory dawn
The princess is waiting for the sword that has won
The colors are not in the twenty-four pack

If I bring him down now
Do you promise to bring me back?

Transition

Don't ya kinda dislike that word? Change, to me, is much more optimistic. I have been thinking about big things for people. Big change. Big movements. Big Callings. Divinely orchestrated networks. What if we all met here and now for such a time as this? What if we were all kings and rulers of this domain,region,message? What if we were to all assemble together to glorify the KING of Kings and in that we were blessed just calling in His presence? What if- like the Kings in the Bible that chose to follow God or not our stories are being written? Do you have a paragraph or chapters devoted to how you have lived your lives thus far? What if we tore down all of the altars to false idols of our forefathers and purified the temples and decreed over our dominion: holiness, fruitfulness, basicallly, heaven on Earth? What if we did not choose to bury our talents for safekeeping, but multiplied them over and over and over? ( Money and Gifts). This is the middle of something glorious, this is this middle of something great, this is a call to arms. Arms lifted high in prayer, in praise, in purpose, in community. We have already begun, let us pick up momentum through encouragment, prayer and prophecy. I decree that you that read this are gaining momentum. You are being infused with creativity from the maker. You are being poured into with wisdom as a thick honey coating your being. You are purified through your confessions and forgiven of iniquities. You are excited to see what is coming. You are not afraid of the call. You will not quiver but will be still under HIS wing of protection and love. At the same time you are released to be who are. What your purpose is, what you were knit together for.

Guess what? We are here for such a time as this.

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Every mother's fear

No you never, ever sleep with the peace that you slept with before you have children. You think infancy is worse than post diaper time, think again.

I awoke suddenly at 3:03 AM, I must have sensed something in my spirit. I then heard hurried feet across the hardwood floors and I knew something was quite wrong. My eldest daughter in her teenage panic began to express her fear of the "creeper at her window". She had been up, afraid to move for the noises outside. She sat in the darkness for at least twenty minutes, thought she might wet her pants. She prayed and finally had the courage to move, to get help, or at least go to the bathroom. She then, to her horror, looked outside the window just in time to see the black "thing" cross her path! "Mom!" She didn't know that instincts had already awaken me, (that spiritual connection you have with your children.) She recapped the story, and then said, " I finally looked out the living room window and the llama was in the street!"
Joel, who had been listening, didn't flinch until he heard that, then he was out of the bed and clothed in 2.3 seconds. I cringed, knowing that I had to help. I wanted to say, "Why did you get those animals, again?" but I didn't, I just got up, got dressed, wound up the emergency flash light, that by the way is well worth the $2.95 on 75% clearance, and joined my husband in rounding up the donkeys. He had already gotten the llama in the gate with corn. Mia and I were basically to guard the path. Joel did his "scary jump" and the donkeys returned to the pen. As I was walking back up to the house I said, Mia, why didn't you just say, " The animals are out." She said, " Well, then you wouldn't have listened to my story."

So, just thought I would give you nonparents and parents of little ones, something to look forward to. If not the animal story then something else, but trust me there will always be something else! Meanwhile, I tossed and turned for the next 2 1/2 hours. Gotta love it.

Monday, February 19, 2007

God Bless Candy too

P.S. Next time you see Candy Hallford give her a hug for being so selfless in everything she does for so many. She is like a secret warrior that never calls attention to how much she really does. She has been caring for Granny and Crystal and still tries to make time for grandkids cupcake valentine things. I am grateful to have a grandmother to my kids like her.



Aunt Crystal Update

Heart Report

Crystal went to Lubbock to see a special heart doctor. He performed a cardiac catheterization. Which basically means he took pictures using moving xrays to look at the arteries of her heart and measure the pumping chamber's strength. She can breathe better now because her lungs are better, but her heart is still pumping at 15- 20%, normal is considered 70%. Praise God that He is caring for her. Most doctors in Abilene would not have even done that test, she made it through without any complications. God has recovered her lungs and has plans to restore her completely, let's press in for full recovery. Full restoration, He who is faithful, will see Crystal's restoration complete. Thank you guys for praying.

Saturday, February 17, 2007

True Brew

Percolate like coffee
Waiting for the brew
Eyes of a child looking straight at you
How is it that one minute
I feel so full of grace
Yet with the minute past
The spirit heart's misplaced
Selfishness, the monster
Eats the wholeness rising
Bread that should be baked, my Lord
Has chilled in fraternizing
With doubt and insecurity
My Lord, my shepard come!
The cliff is calling me
Jagged edge descent
My flesh must die here now
I fear my life is spent

"I will catch you as you fall,"
The lover's voice proclaims
From lamb's uncertain blind
To Lion's assured reign
You are altogether mine
I will refine my fold
Lovely will you shine
As soon as you let go
Quiver not in yielding
Flesh is overated
The ascent to heavens tower
Is flowered in the quaking
Earth moving in the minute
Godspeak in curtain call
Open on stage right
Bow and take your fall

The beans you grind were roasted
To release the flavored cup
The babe dreams divinely
The silver is aglow
Raise me higher bread keeper
Burn my fleshly binds
Forged for your endeavor
Forever love accrue
Empowered and enlisted
Whisper to your royal few
Readied for the battle
Always to be true
Death it has no sting
To know the end with you.



Patricia Munoz Trueblood
February 17, 2007

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

I'm Coming After You


I'm coming after you
I'm coming after you I 'm coming after YOUhoo
I am yours
You are mine
I refuse to be denied

These words are simply haunting me
As I fall into dreams
As I drift into consciousness of day
As I become ever more aware of
How much God wants to dance with me
How much He wants to be close to me
How much I make Him smile
How much His eyes twinkle when I look for Him
How much He wants to hold my hands
How much He wants to sign my permission slips
How much He wants to provide me with every comfort
How much He thinks I am pretty
How often he places His warm hand on my forehead and pushes my hair back again
How much He knows I can do anything
How much He looks for me
How much it grieves Him when I deny Him my heart for the sake of activity
How He welcomes me no matter what
How many times He restarts my race so that I can feel confident to run it
In God's eyes I am not slow, out of shape, goanna get a charlie horse or fall
In my Father's eyes He will sustain me and cover me and love me and make me breakfast in bed and bathe me in His beauty clothe me in his grace and walk with me and talk with me and lead me beside still waters where He will again refuse to be denied, I will drink from His cup.
I am His

Cause He is coming after me, coming after mehee
I love Him and He wouldn't have it any other way

WOW was awesome last night, wish I could bottle it and send it to every woman I know. I am blessed to have been chosen to be part of this body of believers. It was all His idea you know.

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Props Rock or Poprocks? For Sister Jennifer

Four jobs I have had in my life:
1. Waitress in a Mom and Pop Mexican Restaurant with huge fish tanks and candles on the tables named Memo's
2. Receptionist in a OB/Gyn office (my uncle)
3. Olive Garden-sang the songs
4. NURSE in NICU, PICU, Cath Lab, GI Lab,Nuclear Medicine, Mother/ Baby,Wound care, now in school!

Movies I would watch over and over:
5. Gladiator
6. Sound of Music and Terms of Endearment
7. Nacho Libre or the Waltons
8. Elf and Zoolander

Four places you have lived:
9. Charlottesville , Virginia
10. Corpus Christi, TX- Corpus Christi makes my eyes misty , this is David Lee Roth from Van Halen tellin ya so! Had to be there.1986.
11. Point Richmond, CA
12. Altamonte Springs, FL

Four places you have been on vacation:
13. Disneyland
14. Disneyworld
15. Taos, NM
16. New York, NY

Four of my favorite foods are:
17. Pad Thai
18. Barbacoa with homemade corn tortillas and lime with pico de gallo
19. Chichen Tikka Masala, Onion Kulcha or Naan
20. Mom's anything


Four places I would rather be right now:
21. In bed
22. Heaven
23. Some beach, somewhere
24. On a honey moon with my husband with no kidruptions

You guys know where this came from! I am 100 list challenged so this is next best!
Copy and paste on your own blog. Delete my answers and insert your own. Have fun!

Monday, February 05, 2007

New Video, Same Old Awesome Husband



Joel and the Cooking Chicks



My Handsome and Talented Culinary Friend( Also Bound in Holy Matrimony)


Yes, many of you know I am the blessed wife of the sexiest Chef in Clyde. I wanted to invite you all to go to the Tru Blu Site http://trublucatering.com/ and watch an awesome video produced by Tim Prosser of Silhouette Cinematography(www.lifeiscinema.com). For those of you that had the advantage of being there and those of you that were unable to attend- Experience Iron Kitchen Blog Style...and let me know if you like, we might series video blog. I am thinking about co-producing videos with Tim. Starring......Chef Joel, with regular guest star appearances by Brenda Becker......and also Chef Steve Howard. Looking for members of the creative team for pilot show development, any takers?
I know, don't I have enough on my plate? Yes, but, to whom much is given, much is required. If God gave my handsome husband talent, who am I to bury that talent? That would make me a wicked and lazy servant. SO, go watch the video, and let me know what you think! Click on Tru Blu Blog at the top of the page, then click underneath the entry that says, The "Eagle" has landed! read more....

Sunday, February 04, 2007

Back to school

Hi,

School is in full swing. I am trying to keep it together. Pray for me if you will. It is hard to enter into community with a stack of books to the ceiling calling your name.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Joel's Aunt Crystal

Many of you know that Joel's Aunt Crystal is in ICU. She has a HUGE blood clot in her heart. The Doctors are pretty shocked that she is "here". I am pretty sure they don't think she will be much longer. We REJECT this thinking and want to war for her life. Please pray for her. She is a young woman that wants to live. She wants to see her kids, Aaron become a man and Shea get married. She is scared. Please pray for the peace of God to be upon her. Pray for the miraculous. Pray for the Lord himself to allow a string from the hem of his garment ot touch Crystal Roth that she will be restored!. I feel as though I am wrestling spiritually for the enemy to be pinned down and the referree to bang his hand and declare the finish. I know the Lord has already resolved the authority matter. I know he even resolved the identity matter. I just need to experience a miracle in medicine. As some of you know Bella was a miracle. Truly. Ask me how if you don't know. I am not doubting it can be done. I just crave to see it. I long for it. My soul pants for the glory of God to descend from heaven in Crystal's room and divinely heal her heart. Just do it Father! Please. Please. Please.

I WISH THIS COULD HAVE BEEN A POST ABOUT Joel's cool Aunt Crystal. But with a little divine intervention, I will post about God's cool/hot miracle on Joel's cool Aunt.